I created this piece after I was struck by a concept explored in a show I was watching. The show explored the concept of a shade, the part of the soul associated with remorse and inhibition, but more importantly, with feelings of love and empathy. Certain characters losing their shade was used as a means to circumvent the consequences of going through traumatic experiences in a 'you can't hurt if you can't feel' sort of way. However, in losing your shade, the part of yourself responsible for much of your emotions, you’re left as a shadow (pun intended, I think) of your former self. The concept struck a nerve with me because I was going through a bit of mental upheaval at the time and, in some ways, I did feel as though I had ‘lost my shade,’ so to speak. The illustration was born from that concept, morphing along the way.
I Lost My Shade
I lost my shade, and now I burn in the sun. My skin is not my skin. Heaven feels far from earth. Earth is mountains and fog and cold hard glass. And this special corner of earth, my skin, is hell. Today, I travel by sinking, and the only road is to my knees. But if sinking is the only travel, my body will sink upwards and my hair will be a zeppelin. Mother said when you lose your shade and you burn in the sun and your skin is not your skin, chin up. Sometimes heaven is prettier when you approach it from hell.
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