In an era where online dating has become a norm, relationships are still the same messy, wonderful, frustrating things they’ve always been, just with more notifications. Between dating apps, misread texts, and the constant threat of accidentally messaging the wrong group chat, keeping a relationship afloat these days takes a little extra effort. But hey, it’s not impossible. With that in mind, here are some rules of thumb I find make dating in the current era better:

DO: Communicate Like You Actually Want to Be Here

If something’s on your mind, say it. If you like someone, let them know. If something’s bothering you, don’t bottle it up until it explodes over something stupid like who forgot to charge the speaker. Nobody’s a mind reader, and mixed signals just make everything harder than it needs to be.

DON’T: Treat Texting Like a Chess Match

I get it. You don’t want to seem “too available.” Still, waiting exactly 7 hours and 12 minutes to respond just to look mysterious? That’s a game nobody wins. If you like talking to someone, text them back. If you’re busy, say so. No need for psychological warfare.

DO: Set Boundaries and Stick to Them

Whether it’s needing alone time, defining what you want, or simply not being okay with your partner live-streaming your arguments (looking at you, TikTok couples), setting boundaries is key. And no, enforcing boundaries doesn’t make you "difficult". It makes you a person who values their peace.

DON’T: Date Someone Like It’s an Unfinished IKEA 

If your relationship feels like an ongoing home improvement show where you're constantly fixing things, you might be less of a partner and more of a free handyman. People grow on their own time, and love isn’t a renovation project. You can support them, sure, but if they need a complete rebuild, maybe it’s best to let them figure that out first.

DO: Pay Attention to Actions, Not Just Words

Someone can tell you they care, but if they consistently treat you like an afterthought, their actions are speaking louder than their sweet texts at 2 AM. Love is shown, not just spoken.

DON’T: Lose Yourself in the Process 

You’re a whole person, not just one half of a relationship equation. Keep your hobbies, your friendships, and your solo movie nights. Your partner should complement your life, not become your entire world. (Unless you’re literally stranded on an island together—then, fair enough.)

Final Thoughts: Keep It Simple

Relationships don’t have to be a never-ending analysis of mixed signals and overthinking. Show up, be honest, and treat the other person with respect. That’s it. And if the ship starts sinking? Well, at least you’ll know you did your best before grabbing a lifeboat.