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They say that the world is progressing day by day, but why haven't the stereotypes changed over the years? Coming from an interior eastern background, I can say with certainty that today there has been little change in the mindsets of people, especially in rural areas.

I want to speak out about this incident that happened to me, which makes me speak against my own society.

I have always seen people say that women should be careful about not being too tempting and that they need to change certain behavior in order to protect themselves from "men". I was always told to stay away from men and the threats of stranger danger, but what I was not told was that it includes family, too.

I was always close with all my cousins: they were like my best friends and siblings. However, I was closer to one of my male cousins. We were pretty much inseparable; he was 5 years older than me. I was 12 when he once touched me inappropriately, and till today, that haunts me, the thought of how he could do this to me, moreover, the regret that I didn't react. Why did I choose to remain silent?

I was traumatized after that. I still remember that 12-year-old clutching onto her pillow and weeping bitterly. It took me three months to process what had happened, but then I gathered the courage to tell my mom. However, her response was like the last nail in my situation. She said, "Shush! They might hear us," I replied, "But I am the victim, not the abuser, yet I'm supposed to stay quiet?" Then she said something which left me broken. She said, "You are a girl, you have to stay quiet. Also, it is your fault, why were you friends with him to begin with? Plus, he's family, I can't ruin the relations".

That day, I realized that there is not much awareness about how to address abuse coming from your family. Something that was so inappropriate was being brushed under the rug and allowed to happen.

When a woman works for her earnings, steps outside of her boundaries, sings or dances, then the men in my region will lecture about religion, but do men have no religious boundaries? Are they free to do anything they will, even something as despicable as this?

I was not able to act upon it myself; however, I do advise all women reading this article please take care to protect your vulnerability, and know it’s a strength, not a weakness. As Marianne Williamson says, "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us." 

Even today, I am still not able to get out of that emotional struggle. I fear being around men, I fear footsteps, but I know if someone can break this cycle of generational trauma, it's going to be us, because sometimes, not everyone will be your guardian angel; sometimes, you have to be your own.

In my region, where so much is said about progress, there is still much to change. This story is part of speaking out, not just for myself, but for others who remain unheard. Change begins when we refuse to accept silence as the norm and when we push to break harmful cycles.

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For support in any country, the NO MORE Global Directory offers helplines and resources for survivors of sexual violence and their loved ones, no matter where they are.