Just as university is full of opportunities and new experiences, it is also full of pitfalls. Too often I've seen people be persuaded into being pushed past their limits, or worse, past the point of harm.

Depending on the university, the culture surrounding parties, drugs, gambling and smoking can run rampant. And while there's nothing wrong with letting loose and having a bit of fun, it's important to respect your own boundaries during this very volatile period where you're likely to be very far from home. Just as it's important to not be afraid to say yes to new things, it's equally as crucial to be able to say no when you feel you should. Understand that no one should force you to do things you are not willing to do and surround yourself with people who would respect your boundaries. 

Be that kind of friend to the people around you as well; the different people you meet will have different boundaries, values and beliefs, and it's important for all those involved to be mutually respectful of those. At the same time, keep yourself and the people around you safe: a lot of students when faced with the newfound freedom of being away from their guardians tend to let loose, sometimes overly so, and it's important to intervene before they put themselves or others in danger. Too many times have I stroked someone's back while they puked in some random toilet or field in the middle of nowhere- believe me when I say partying and drinking is not all it's cracked up to be. And it's not like it is in the movies.

However, beyond just with regards to drinking and partying culture, peer pressure has many more effects. When it comes to academics, imposter syndrome poses a challenge to many. Keep your head high- you passed admissions just like every other student, and you deserve to be here. When I first entered university I was terrified of asking questions. Surrounded by my peers, I grew paranoid of being exposed as a fraud by my questions and mocked mercilessly behind my back (now that I've been here a while, I'm instead mocked mercilessly right to my face by my very good friends, all with love of course). 

Yet as much as it may seem like it, university is far from a place to boast your expertise, or show off to one another- it's a place to learn. You're not expected to know everything, and most teachers delight in that, in fact, because it means they actually have something to teach you, and you actually have something to learn. It's difficult to internalise that fact when you're surrounded by impressive people, but you should try and do so as much as possible. I, for one, definitely wished I realised sooner that I didn't pay a hefty sum to study overseas just to pretend to know things, I wished I had asked as many questions as possible. It's not very often you come by an environment with experts in their field being readily available to impart knowledge and a diverse network of peers to study alongside- make use of it! Remember that anyone who shows off or turns up their nose at you genuinely trying to learn is probably going through their own insecurities and that very frankly, their opinion of you isn't worth wasting your resources or effort.

As for general lifestyle, there is also immense pressure to conform to others' lifestyles or expectations. Some social circles can feel like a popularity contest where students fight to be the next 'Big Name on Campus' (I first thought it was cartoonish, but it can be actually quite a big thing somehow) with endless parties and socialising. In other circles, the corporate grind is relentless. People stuff their holidays full of insight events, spring weeks, webinars, and internships, and the constant search continues for the 'Next Big Hustle'. Let me first say that there is absolutely nothing wrong with either of these approaches to university: as long as it is done in a safe, sustainable and healthy way, many people can feel fulfilment with these social or academic ventures. If you're one of them, that's great. But I think many people get swept up in the hype of others doing these things and push themselves into doing things they aren't as interested in. I personally fell into this during the time leading up to uni, you can read more about my experience with that here.

During my first week of university, I definitely felt this overwhelming pressure to get to know as many people as possible, go to as many big events as possible, and make the most of the 'Classic Uni Experience'. And it was exhausting. Meeting new people can be a fun experience, but I realised that staying out late and drinking every night was definitely not my thing. For those with a lower social battery like mine, just know that there is no right way to enjoy university and everyone has their own way that works for them. I can guarantee that some of my peers who spend their Friday night holed in their room watching YouTube are infinitely happier than other peers waking up half-dead and hungover in some random bloke's toilet. Don't stress about pushing yourself to do things that don't interest you in desperation to meet people- university is chock full of all kinds of people, and there are plenty of opportunities to connect with your community. Instead of on the dance floor or at the bar, my friends and I spend a lot of our nights playing board games or Mario Kart in the college common room.

Pressure came again in my second term of university, with droves of my peers submitting application after application for spring weeks, internships and more. I attempted to join in as well, but honestly, the adjustment to university was hard on me, and I only had the emotional bandwidth to start taking applications seriously after the application season was drawing to a close. As such when summer drew near I was jobless. Originally, as my peers around me boasted or complained about their own projects, I felt quite humiliated. Was I somehow already behind? But in hindsight, this was the best decision for me. I simply was not ready to undertake something at that time. Instead, I spent time with family and loved ones back home, and the feelings of inadequacy and humiliation slowly faded away as I realised this path worked best for me after all. There will always be people miles ahead of you, whether it be in school, at work, at any stage of life. But at the risk of sounding cliche, life really is a marathon, not a sprint- everyone moves at their own pace, and everyone has their own version of success.

Altogether, the main message is this: stay true to yourself. Stay open to change, of course, but don't lose sight of what you value. University is an overwhelming deluge of new information and experiences; it's easy to get swept away, but it's also in the face of this pressure that one can build the strongest foundation.