Why do all female protagonists have to get married? This question has struck me countless times after finishing beautiful stories. Many novels tend to have their female characters feature in the epilogue as wives, mothers and not much more. Is there anything wrong with desiring to have children and a husband? Of course not. Does every woman choose to focus on a career? No. Should we still have representation of this? Absolutely. In this case, I’m talking about when writers completely leave out their female character’s ambitions and simply decide to marry them off. If you have built a character full of such passionate dreams, they should be allowed the chance to reach them regardless of gender.

Young girls reading stories need to see female characters that solely rely on themselves. It is inherently sexist to design women in stories that cannot develop as characters, have goals or be a multi-dimensional character without their romantic counterpart. Women are fully capable of being complex psychologically and fascinating to read about without having a man that their entire character is centred around. We need female protagonists that overcome the obstacles without automatically falling in love along the way. We need fictional women that are not saved by a dashing knight but rescue themselves from that tower. We need to remind little girls that they are more than who they will love one day. 

Equally, I’ve read stories where the female protagonist has lost her personality to a relationship. These tales have started out with a girl that knows exactly what she wants, what she is capable of and radiates confidence. Female characters that start out as very outspoken, articulate and powerful. Until the hunky male love interest shows up. Next, these fictional girls are only sparks of a once fiery personality and they have become completely subservient to this male character. They no longer fight for themselves, defend themselves against him or challenge his views. All they think about is him. Why is his happiness more important than their literal lives? As a young woman in today's society, this is incredibly frustrating to read. 

Writing a romantic story is not wrong at all. If I said that, I would be a total hypocrite. Many readers adore the warm-and-fuzzy feeling of romance and little cute moments and they can be gorgeously written when there is balance. Romance does not have to involve a loss of personality. If your protagonist has quite an argumentative side or runs a debate club, for example, let this manifest itself as playful banter with their love interest. There are creative ways to stretch beyond a typical romance story and make memorable pairs that never lose their heart, and that starts with knowing your characters inside-out. Perhaps more importantly, it starts with respecting your female characters. Personally, I do love a bit of romance in writing and reading. It feels very full-circle to write a million and one sickly sweet moments about your book couple after building up their relationship throughout the story. However, the relationship should always allow the plot and development to progress instead of disintegrating it. 

Independent women deserve to be the stars of their own stories with or without a man. Do not let the story become fully his after the relationship starts. If you have spent ages designing and developing your female characters, let that flourish and not be shadowed by the romantic subplot. I think there are endings where it makes perfect sense for the female character to get married and become a mother, because that fits her story well. Just do not let her lose herself! On that note, do not be afraid to let your fictional girls have unconventional endings. Maybe they travel. Have a career. Become someone outside of what society says they should be. Regardless of their ending, let your female characters have one that fits. One that feels realistic for them and doesn’t get rid of all their development. One that shows how powerful women are, whether that’s as an amazing mother or an ambitious leader.