Have you ever found yourself fixating on the negative aspects of a situation and feeling weighed down by it? If so, you're not alone. This common experience is powerfully depicted in Grey's Anatomy (2005- Present), particularly through the character Derek Shepherd and his struggle with depression. His journey offers not only a relatable portrayal of negative fixation but also valuable lessons on how to feel better and approach life more positively.

In Season 5, Derek Shepherd falls into a deep depression, consumed by the number of patients he believes he has "killed" in surgery. Despite having saved many lives, Derek fixates on the few that were lost, allowing this one negative aspect to overshadow his numerous successes. Derek's mental state deteriorates as he obsesses over the patients who died during his surgeries, rather than considering the fact that many of these patients were already in critical condition. As Meredith Grey wisely points out to him:

"Most of these patients were terminal, and you take on impossible cases. You were their last chance."

Derek's way of thinking is a classic example of what Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) refers to as a "mental filter" or "cognitive tunnel." This occurs when someone, like Derek, focuses solely on the negative aspects of a situation, ignoring the broader context that could provide a more balanced perspective. Many of us are prone to this type of thinking, often accompanied by an overwhelming sense of responsibility. A less extreme example is when we get a bad grade in school, we might blame ourselves for not doing better, even though everyone in the class received a low grade or we were dealing with important personal issues at the time.

Another cognitive distortion that is in line with this is personalization. This is where we look at negative situations in the world and think we are the root cause of those problems occurring. We might unjustly blame ourselves for outcomes that are far more complex and contextual than we acknowledge. To break free from this negative fixation, it's crucial to consider all aspects of a situation rather than honing in on the negative. As Meredith advises Derek:

"You need to look at the bigger picture."

While it’s essential to look at the big picture and avoid personalizing situations, this can sometimes be easier said than done. In such cases, finding a positive meaning in our experiences can be more effective. This is precisely what Derek does one season later, offering a valuable lesson. He observes another surgeon, April Kepner, grappling with over-responsibility after a patient’s death. Derek then reassures her with a mindset that is equally useful:

"If you don’t feel all the losses, if they don’t hurt you and humble you, that’s how you know you’re not cut out for this work."

This perspective adds a beautiful layer of nuance to Derek's earlier depression. I believe his intense emotions over the deaths of his patients are not just signs of despair but also reflect his deep sense of responsibility and care for human life. Similarly, the negative feelings we experience—whether it’s stress about school or guilt over a mistake—often indicate that we genuinely care about what's going on in our lives and are responsible. While these emotions don’t need to dominate our lives, acknowledging their positive roots can make them easier to manage and even turn them into strengths.

So, when faced with negative situations, always remember to look at the bigger picture.